A Brief History Of Time

It's almost the end of the year, I'm not home tomorrow much and probably won't have time for a diary entry so I thought I'd reflect on the year tonight.



In January I was involved in a Vanilla relationship with a lovely guy that although we made fabulous friends, as lovers it was too intense on some levels and yet no way it could work on others, basically doomed (as later proved to be) to failure.

February and on into March the same, with several hiccups and me missing what I'd experienced with Cyan last year, I knew I needed Chocolate with my Vanilla. There were even a couple of times when I thought things may start up again with Cyan, but it didn't happen, mostly because I recognised how selfish he is, no give and all take. But who else would be able to coax me into submission the way he could? I couldn't envisage anyone really, not that suited all my needs.

When Ged broke up with me in March I immersed myself in the lifestyle more and more, taking on a girl as a submissive in March.
Now I've never been sexually attracted to females, my only experience with a woman was with Cyan last year, and to say nothing much happened between me and her is an understatement really, so I can't say why I took pet on, but she appealed to me on several levels.

March and April I played with my new found pet as often as possible, setting her rules for her life to help improve her self esteem and her quality of life in general. Every rule I set her had a reason and most definitely not for me to get a kick from, that's not how it works for me when it comes to rules, there has to be a logical reason and a need for it to be set in the first place.

Still in April and I released pet, she'd done something so serious I couldn't even punish her for it as absolution, she broke my trust and without that there can be nothing.
I was hurt beyond belief, my pet was so lovable and desperate to please I couldn't understand how or why she could do this.

In May I was persuaded by a Dom we both know to take her back, we went to see her together and talked things through, needless to say I agreed under certain conditions to give her another chance.
I was also introduced to one of the most important people in my life in May, a mutual friend brought us together as she thought we'd get on, and she was more right than even she could imagine.
I love Felix and we just clicked from our first phone conversation, he's like the mirror image of my Dominant half, and we've so many things in common it's uncanny. We have no secrets from each other, and are so at ease we can discuss even the most intimate details of our lives without being embarrassed.
Thank you wench for bringing this amazing person into my life, shame you won't pay my mobile bills though lmao.

Flaming June, play continued and I was all over the place as usual trying to fit everything in. Oh and somewhere around this time I went to visit a Dom, I'll be kind and say he was not experienced and I didn't suit his requirements.

July I went to see wench again, first visit was June and same as before we hit it off, she's the mirror of my submissive side, although she's been in denial about her need to submit for a long time and is only now beginning to accept it. I do understand as I find it a huge challenge myself, far easier for me to let the Dominant out, but then some part of me feels unfulfilled.

I'll finish this next time, too much for one entry.






"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood

This Earth Or Fullers?

Incredibly tired today, I'm not an early morning person really and work has been busy to say the least. I feel a little guilty I've not had much time for Master this week, but I know He understands, thank goodness life will get back to what resembles normality in a few days.

I think sometimes people forget that I'm a switch since Master collared me. What planet is a Dom from who tells the girl I look after that he is going to "make" me release her from my protective collar so he can have her.

I suspect there is going to be a little upset, because nobody tells me what I will do except my Master, and I submit only to Him, but even so any submissive has the right to say no, being submissive does not mean you're a doormat.

Something else that I feel others in the lifestyle have a hard time accepting is that I am a switch, and no it's not just a kinky bedroom game for me.
I take this all very seriously, I could never submit to anyone I know I could have submit to me, both sides of my persona are completely separate.

Before I met Master the first time He was tested in subtle (and some not so subtle) ways to see if He would submit to me, amazing how many Doms didn't even make it past the first test, several contacted me confessing submissive desires.
Others within a very short time of corresponding with them found themselves wanting me to Domme them, apparently I discovered and pressed buttons they didn't know they had.
Now that's something I do get a kick from, exploring people and discovering their hidden or even unknown desires, helps me in no small way to learn about myself too.




"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood

Steel Band

Well today my new collar arrived with Master, although I've only seen a photo of it, it looks fabulous.

Next Monday He will place it around my neck and I'll wear it proudly.

Oh yes New Years eve we've a party to attend with several other D/s couples, now that should be interesting as apparently there are some games planned, and you can bet it's not scrabble or musical chairs; more like pass the parcel and musical subbies.

"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood

Christmas Wenteth

It's been a quick Christmas that's for sure, spent most of it driving all over the place, family, Master, home, work; I'm almost glad it's nearly over.

There's been no play, but a fair amount of Vanilla sex with just a few Chocolate sprinkles, seems sometimes Master has only to look at me to become erect, not that I'm complaining, far from it.
I love being touched, kissed and fucked and as far as I'm concerned being woken up with a finger on my clit or stroking my nipple, and let's face it what better way to start the day than an orgasm or two?

Christmas night we spent the whole night together, I love being curled up next to Master, it feels very natural to be in bed with him sleeping.

Master has four new canes to use on me, only had a couple of strokes with them so far as a test, have to say they're very stingy and hmm I suspect I'm going to have a few red stripes across my bottom very soon.

One of my Christmas gifts was a pair of silver nipple shields, sadly my nipples are far too large to fit them, when Master has my nipples pierced I'll need some custom made ones I think so they fit nicely, I can tell they'll look fabulous though.

My new collar arrives tomorrow, a stainless steel slave collar for Master to lock around my neck, I'll post a photo of it soon.





"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood

Christmas Cummeth

Well apparently my Christmas gift is lost in space somewhere between Chicago O'Hare airport, Santas sleigh is one parcel lighter this year, at least for now.

The gift is my collar, specially ordered from a company in America, I chose it myself and it's something I see as very symbolic but just that, a symbol of my enslavement to Master, I don't need it to tell me that I belong to Him

Master is upset that He won't have it to place around my neck on Christmas morning, but for me that day or another soon after makes no difference.

For me it's never been the gift, but the sentiment behind it, I've never given to receive either, and I don't think it's quite dawned on Him yet that I have my gift this year, Him.


"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood

A Fine Balance

I've so much going on in my head at the moment, so much to think about and so many changes to come.
I'm a strong person in many ways, but in others much less so and I think it's beginning to tell.
Perhaps it's just that my relationship with my Master has moved so quickly, been incredibly intense, not something I've experienced before. Well let's face it, I am very wary of commitment, always have been, but this time I didn't run away, I ran towards what was offered.

There's so much about us that works, some things that don't, but if we compromise maybe they will, honesty and openness is the way forward.
For me experience has proved that it's not the major things that will cause problems in a relationship, but the small niggly habits that will grate on the nerves and cause disharmony.

Now here's a thought for you, if involved in a 24/7 Master/slave relationship just how often is the slave allowed to point out to the Master that it really is much better to put the cap on the toothpaste, close the toilet lid etc etc.
Technically speaking a slave has no rights, Masters word is law and he is free to do as He chooses. Our relationships is not like that and will be a mix of Vanilla too, somewhere amidst all this we need to find a balance that works for us.
Master (I'm glad to say), sees me not only as his slave, but also as his partner, friend and lover, so the dynamics are a complex mix and definitely need fine tuning, it's going to take time I suspect.


"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood

Vanilla Days

An unplanned day together today, and we spent it doing mostly nilla sex and curled up in bed.
The sex as always was excellent, I love to have Him cum inside me, feel His cock swell and become harder than an iron rod ramming inside me, just before He lets out a loud groan of pleasure and let's go.
Five times today He fucked me, not bad for a man in His 40s lol.

This afternoon we did a little Christmas shopping, needs must as the season is here, so I wandered around the supermarket with Him in tow, not a particularly pleasant experience for us both. I hate shopping, we both like the same things on the whole, but have very different ideas about what to get and why. I'm impatient and just want to get what I need as fast as possible, and leave.

I'm not a fussy person, but there are some things I won't concede on, not sure how well received they were when I mentioned them.
But He has to know much as I love him I'm not blind to certain things, and the practical side of me knows without doubt that unless the vanilla side of life works then the M/s side will ultimately fail.

Not sure how someone with such a Dominant personality can accept being told how things are to be by their slave, we shall see. This aspect of any relationship only comes to light by spending time together outside of the bedroom, something I've been loathe to do as we mesh so well play wise.



"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."
DanesWood