Friday, 29 June 2012

Sensory Overload

I had a fabulous time last night and so did St.

We'd arranged to meet at a club that's halfway between us, a good place to meet midweek when we usually have work the next day.
What St didn't know is that I'd got something planned for him, if the right people were there and thankfully they were :-)

We relaxed on comfy bench seating and chatted to people we knew, then I re-positioned us both so he was sat between my legs with his back to me.
I kissed his head, ears and neck while stroking his chest and nipples. Using finger and thumb on both hands I gently squeezed both of his nipples, kissing him and whispering into his ear of all the lovely things I could do to him and that we can do together.

His moans and squirming body told me I was pressing all the right buttons, so I swapped my fingers for clover clamps on his nipples and added a pinwheel to roll over his chest, sides and arms.

My hand over his mouth and nose to control his breathing sent him even deeper. It was only a birthday cake being brought to the table next to us for a friend that brought him out of it and we paused in our playtime.

I ate a piece of cake and St sat grinning happily next to me, chatting to those sat around us MW and ib being two of them. A drink and more chat, then I decided we should go and play properly as our favourite bench was free.

St carried my toys through and then went to the loo. While he was away I laid out the toys I planned to use and a few I knew I wouldn’t be.

 On his return he got himself comfy. I slipped a blindfold over his head and started to warm him up with my gorgeous lambskin flogger. I flicked and stroked, teased and tickled before changing to a whippier toy that I have. Some gentle flicks, some harder whacks and I decided it was time to carry out my plan. I stepped away a little and gestured to my friend ib that I was ready for her and then resumed flogging St.

A few seconds later I was joined by my two co-conspirators ib and K I handed them both a pinwheel and asked them to roll it all over him. I swapped my whippy flogger for a couple of canes and began to tap his bottom lightly.

I couldn’t help but giggle as St groaned loudly as he felt both pinwheels running down his back at the same time and me twilting on his bottom with the cane.
In no time at all he was a quivering space cadet. I love it when he’s in that state. 

The ladies did a fantastic job with the pinwheels and stroking him with fingers. He loves that combination of sensations in play and it always has a fabulous effect on him. As he was having such a good time I increased the intensity with the cane, first time I’ve used it so hard on him. Damn it felt good, long time since I’ve been able to cane someone like that. He was a groaning, moaning, quivering wreck, total sensory overload.

When I decided he’d had enough I thanked the ladies for their help and stood stroking talking to him while he came down. I love this time too as he’s just so loveable, not that he isn’t all the time, just especially so when he’s a space cadet like this.

In the time we were alone I had a few attempts at trying to make him cum with breathplay and suggestion. It worked last time we were at this event and it was incredibly erotic knowing I'd made him orgasm and nobody knew but the two of us. Although a couple of people may have wondered why he kept adjusting his squidgy jock strap afterwards. He was too distracted I think this time, so in the end I gave up, but we were both incredibly horny and when he comes here on Saturday I think he'll be ripping my clothes off before he's even inside the door.

Most people had left by the time we went to sit down again, so smiley cuddle time, making the most of every minute before we went home. AV came to chat for a minutes, commented how lovely it is to see us so loved up and then it was time to go home.

Another fantastic evening with St. It's a smallish event, but that makes it a rather intimate evening. Everyone is friendly and there’s always lots of play. Now I just have to wait until Saturday to reap what I’ve sown last night ;-)

Just in case anyone wasn’t sure………I love my man J

"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing." 

Sunday, 24 June 2012

Inspired by Chick Flicks

Funny isn’t it, how we view sex and romance, the ideal happy ever after story.
Today I’ve been watching chick flicks and shedding a few tears, which is of course what we’re supposed to do over soppy romantic films.

I’ve never been married, I’ve been engaged twice, although after accepting the first proposal I avoided naming the day because I knew it didn’t feel right and in the end, I made the right choice.

The second time, we had the date. We had a venue. We had two weddings in mind.
A Hand Fasting where Sophia wore the dress and decorated a beautiful barn and the way it looked was to be a surprise for me on the day.
There was to be a second wedding for my family at a register office and this time would be Mark at the official ceremony.

I never tired of looking at my partner, didn’t matter to me if it was Mark or Sophia I was with, inside the essence was the same person, it was just the exterior presented to the rest of the world that differed. Every day, every minute, was special, it mattered and we couldn’t bear to be apart for even a few hours. It was Mark who felt the need for us to marry, to commit that way.

Getting married didn’t really seem that important to me. I think over the years I’d gone through the various stages of expecting it would happen, it was likely to happen, it was still possible to, it was never going to happen for me.

It wasn’t the princess for a day experience I’d wanted, it was the commitment, the fact that for once in my life someone loved me enough to promise to always be there for me, because they wanted to be.

When I locked the collar around Mark’s neck within days of meeting, I knew I’d found my soulmate. Everything about us just meshed perfectly, although of course neither of us were perfect people.

Every day our love grew stronger, I couldn’t imagine ever wanting to be with anyone else. It wasn’t easy. I grieved for Mark as Sophia took over. I watched the man I met and fell in love with at first sight fade gradually away. It was like a slow death, the only comparison I can make really. We talked all the time, communication was key. I loved Mark, but I also loved the butterfly that was slowly emerging from its chrysalis, Sophia.

When Sophia died, there was nothing to replace her. No gradual fading away. She was ripped away from me in a brutal way that left me so devastated I didn’t know how I would ever be able to continue.

The first few weeks were filled with practicality. Arranging the funeral, finding a place to live, breathing. Friends brought me meals, flowers, shoulders to cry on. We consoled each other with stories of her exploits, the type of person she was and that Mark had been.

People kept telling me time heals. I said it then and I say it now two and a half years on, no it doesn’t. What we do is find a way to go on, to live. I still have a huge gaping wound that will never heal and never will.

It’s a bumpy ride, I’ve made choices that were right for me at the time, they didn’t work out, but I never expected them to. That doesn’t mean that I wasn’t hurt, because I was.

I’m not the same person I was 4 years ago. Meeting Mark changed me and changed my life, for the better.

I’m not the same person I was 3 years ago. That me was smashed to smithereens at 4.40pm on the 9th of November 2009.

Since then I’ve pieced myself back together, into some semblance of a human being. Emotionally I’m often rather fragile. Small things hurt me that in the past I’d be able to easily shrug off.
I’ve never given up, although I have felt like it at times. I’ve continued on the path laid out for me, making choices, learning, growing, never forgetting.

And now, now I have someone in my life who loves me wholeheartedly. Someone I can trust, love, treasure, caress, beat, kiss within an inch of his life. Someone who without being asked, stepped up to the mark when it mattered and told me how he felt at a turning point in both our lives.

Naturally he’s a shy person, he wasn’t looking for a relationship because of his current circumstances, but he recognised he was at a crossroads, beside me. We could easily have gone down separate paths that day, instead he took me by the hand and led us down a path together, to continue a journey that we’d started by accident almost. Some may call it fate.

He’s done the marriage thing and doesn’t feel any urge to do it again. So I know that’s not going to be on the cards for us. I did feel a pang of regret, but then my next thought was…………would I rather one special day where everyone gets to eat and drink at our expense while we make a public commitment to be together. Or do I look into his eyes every day and see the love he has for me, hear the words he tells me every single day, over and over in a way I doubt I’ll ever tire of.
I know which I’d rather have.

"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing." 

Saturday, 23 June 2012

The Meaning of Friendship

I've spent a little time pondering lately about friends and what friendship means to me and to others.

For me I always try to be honest with friends, offer support and advice if needed and although there have been times I've been envious of what a friend may have I've never seen it as anything more than perhaps something I can aspire to or as a model for how I might conduct myself.

A hard lesson I've learned over the years is that when a friend uses their position to take something from you, money, possessions or to use your trust to manipulate you and others in your circle. 
Perhaps this is because they're dissatisfied with their current circumstances and see taking something for themselves from another as a fast track way to get what they want.

Funny isn't it how much more an act of betrayal this seems when done by someone professing friendship and wanting only the best for you.

The vast majority of people I allow close to me would never dream of doing anything so dishonest or underhand, but then that's why they're still close to me.

So to all my true friends, please be aware how much I appreciate you, because it's not something we say enough in my opinion.

"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."

Friday, 15 June 2012



Each breath you take
My hand dictates
Each gasp and sigh
You reach new highs
Each thrust and moan
New seeds are sown
Each blood red line
Of the canes design
Each bruise I make
My heart you take
Soft words I utter
For pain and pleasure
There is no measure
But you, my love
I’ll always treasure

"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing." 

Free At Last

I feel free. It's taken this long to realise it, well it was Tuesday actually.
There I was with St at his local munch, we're sat talking and laughing with a bunch of people and he rested his head on my shoulder and I realised I'd not thought about S at all in a couple of days and just how fabulous it was to be with St. Love has grown where I'd least expected it when I was with S. 
St and I talked about it last night and he's realised he's over S too. S never considered how St might feel, it's not right to take a partner for granted in that way and S is a selfish fool for doing so.
I actually feel sorry for S, because he's constantly dissatisfied with life always thinking he needs something more and that means he'll never be happy.
Every time I see St it gets better and better. The connection has really grown between us and wow the play is amazing. I've introduced him to breath play and using a combination of sensation play, breath control and suggestion, I actually made him ejaculate without touching his cock. It's been a couple of weeks now and he's still finding it amazing that I was able to do that to him. I suspected it might be possible following a conversation we had, but wasn't sure.  
I'm incredibly blessed that St places such trust in me I'm able to take him to such deep places mentally. I shall take great care never to abuse that trust and always put US first because I can't imagine I need anything St can't give me in one way or another.

"The most powerful sexual organ in the body is our brain, open your mind and allow your fantasies free reign, mutual pleasure between consenting adults is a wonderful thing."